As a traveler, I'm not surprised to find myself processing the concept of "home" lately. It's a topic that I've processed nearly non-stop since I moved to Oregon in 2001, but I have deeper thoughts now. So let's see if I can put them into words.
We've all heard, "Home is where the heart is," "Home is where you hang your hat," "Home is with your loved ones." None of these are wrong, but none of them encapsulates every aspect of home for me. With that in mind, I have broken down my processing into two parts: my concept(s) of home, and other people's expectations of my concept(s) of home.
My concept(s) of home:
Home is hard to define, but for the purposes of this section, it is a place where I can be completely myself and (mostly) not feel like a foreigner.
It's probably obvious to most people who know me, but home is not just one place. I can be "at home" in just about every place I've lived, and in some places I haven't. I can feel "like this is home" in a church, at a friend's house, or in a place of work. I feel equally home in Southern California and in Oklahoma. In the Filipino church where I was raised and in my dad's current church. At my college job in Plant Services and in my post-college job in Australia. Even now, after years away from some of those places/people, I know that a significant piece of me would be home there, were I to walk in the door tomorrow.
But for me, having lived and given of myself to many, many places and people, I can never feel completely home in any one place or with any one group of people. When I leave a piece of myself behind somewhere (or with someone), I know that that piece of me will ever only be at home at that place or with that person. Part of me is sad that I cannot gather up all of those pieces of myself again. But the other part of me doesn't regret for a moment any of my life and love decisions. The thing that is so appealing about heaven is that my entire self will be at home (with Jesus, no less!).
In my current Location Independent life/work situation, home has two immediate, practical meanings:
1. It's easy for me to call my hotel room "home" because that's where my stuff is.
2. But I learned in 2011 that I can live anywhere and put up with almost anything if I'm with my family. I have no particular love for Minnesota, but "going home for Christmas" meant being in the midst of my crazy, big, loud family; snuggling with any sister or brother at any time; talking to my mom in person and being interrupted every three seconds; speed-talking and having people understand me; reading a book in a comfy seat while the chaos around me faded and I lost myself in the pages. I didn't go home to Minnesota - I went home to my family where I could be completely myself and not feel like a foreigner.
The way I live (half-in, half-out of my car; not knowing where I'm going to be from month to month)...well, it just seems right to me. It wouldn't have been right at other times in my life, and it will probably get old at some point. But for now, I'm perfectly happy - and I mean, really, really happy - to have my current life. I feel like I was born for it, and all my previous life experiences have led to it.
But over 99% of the people I interact with have never experienced this lifestyle and probably never will. That's where the second part of my processing comes in.
Other people's expectations of my concept(s) of home:
As a working, responsible citizen of the United States, I am expected to have a "home address." I don't. People had to send my Christmas presents to my family's MN home. I can't order anything from eBay or Amazon because I don't know if I'll still be living in the same hotel or the same room when it's delivered. My DL says MN, but I have bank accounts in two different states and coffee punch cards for at least four in my wallet.
As a traveler, I get asked all the time, "where's home for you?" It's a fair question, I guess, but I don't have a one-word answer. On the first day of my new job assignment, I had a conversation much like this with the lady who was processing my I-9:
her: Where are you from?
me: Most recently, from Missouri.
her: Oh, your Driver's license says Minnesota.
me: Yeah, that's where my parents live.
her: Your Social Security number - where's that from? Like, where were you born?
me: Dallas, TX
her: Ah, so that's where you were raised?
me: No, I grew up in Southern California.
Yes, when I say "I'm from everywhere," I really mean that. But most people have no concept of that, unless they're from a military family or something.
I wish I had an alternative to the question, "where is home for you?" and its equally frustrating twin, "where are you from?" I wish it weren't the opener question for get-to-know-you conversations. I'm perfectly okay with having a complicated and/or ambiguous answer, but I am a bit tired of everyone's confused looks and are-you-crazy attitudes.
I recently read the following article: 17 Location Independent Entrepreneurs Define “Home”. I was struck by how many of the 17 entrepreneurs said something like, "Wherever I have my backpack and a wi-fi connection, I'm home." While I have not gotten to where I can live out of a backpack (hey, this girl has to have her hair products and make-up kit), I do resonate with the idea that an Internet connection is all that's needed to be "home."
I will never, ever be physically present with everyone I love, all at once. So I might as well be away from them somewhere cool that has excellent wi-fi.
I love my life.
02 January 2012
01 January 2012
Dec Reads and Year-End Literary Reflections
December recommendation: Divergent. It’s the newest book in
the newest wave of young adult literature (post-apocalyptic), and it received
the 2011 GoodReads Choice Award. Fantastically written and not
nearly as violent as The Hunger Games, it’s a fast but thought-provoking read.
I read it in a day.
2011 recommendation: The Hunger Games. I know it’s all like
mainstream and stuff now, and they’re coming out with a movie, but they were
the only books this year for which I lost sleep. Bethany asked me earlier this
month what I thought of them, and I responded, “The trilogy is violent,
psychologically disturbing, heart-wrenching, and kind of disgusting. Yet it
manages to be fascinating, riveting, and utterly fabulous.” I think that about
sums it up.
My thought on post-vampire YA lit: I’ve now read three
entire series of YA post-apocalyptic literature, and Divergent. In each one,
the protagonist is a teenage girl. I understand why this is so (that’s their
market, teenage girls provide easy fodder for conflict, etc.), but I would be
interested in a series that sees the breakdown (or re-making) of social
constructs through the eyes of a boy, or even a couple of characters.
On the other hand, books like Jasper Fforde’s Shades of Grey and Lois Lowry’s The Giver are not YA, and their protagonists are male. I find
this to be an interesting distinction.
Aaaaanyway, here is my total count for the year:
Books finished: 58
Most books read in a month: 13
Books unread on my shelf: Ummm...I can't remember. I think it's like 6.
Goal for 2012: Tristram Shandy. Get ready for some blogging,
baby, because it’s a doozy.
26 December 2011
Eleven things I learned in '11
11. No one likes it when you say something negative about their home state, but Georgians reeeeallllly don't like it.
10. Defining your dream is half the battle to achieving it.
9. Brandy snifters make excellent centerpieces.
8. A large part of me is home in Oklahoma, even though I've never lived there.
7. Nothing can prepare you for the emotional impact of moving to a natural disaster-destroyed town.
6. Nothing except travel can prepare you for travel.
5. Not all the single guys my age are fat, bald, and desperate (only about half of them are).
4. It's not so much novels that I'm addicted to, as the art of story-telling; watching entire seasons of television shows is equally rewarding on that level.
3. The phrase "location independent" is something I am going to start using regularly.
2. Living in a hotel is AWESOME.
1. Making your dreams come true is bloody hard work, mate. And in the end, it's God that makes it all happen anyway.
10. Defining your dream is half the battle to achieving it.
9. Brandy snifters make excellent centerpieces.
8. A large part of me is home in Oklahoma, even though I've never lived there.
7. Nothing can prepare you for the emotional impact of moving to a natural disaster-destroyed town.
6. Nothing except travel can prepare you for travel.
5. Not all the single guys my age are fat, bald, and desperate (only about half of them are).
4. It's not so much novels that I'm addicted to, as the art of story-telling; watching entire seasons of television shows is equally rewarding on that level.
3. The phrase "location independent" is something I am going to start using regularly.
2. Living in a hotel is AWESOME.
1. Making your dreams come true is bloody hard work, mate. And in the end, it's God that makes it all happen anyway.
10 December 2011
A Trip Fraught With Peril and Adventure
It's a long story, and I won't bore you with the details of the corporate politics, but I found myself needing to be hired back to Amedisys in order to start my new assignment in Georgia. My last day in Joplin was Dec. 6, and as of 4:30 that day, I still had not been able to get a hold of anyone to help me with my questions and paperwork and employment details. It was stressful, to say the least.
Fortunately for me, the CEO came to visit our office that day, along with one of the Executive Vice Presidents and one of the Senior Vice Presidents. Also, it just so happened that I was able to ride along with the CEO and the marketing person for my office, on a tour of the Joplin tornado damage. At the end of the ride, I had the assurance of Mr. CEO that my problem (of political crap hindering my employment) would be taken care of immediately; by the end of the night, I had the same assurance from the EVP and SVP.
That night, I finished packing my car and went to bed happy that I wouldn't have anything else to worry about.
The next day, I left the house of the coworker who had put me up for a few nights, and started heading to the Greyhound station to pick up my mom. I got a call from a lady in HR, who was super confused as to why I would be moving to Georgia that day and pretty much told me I was crazy for thinking I had a job to go to.
So I picked up my mom and took her to lunch and toured Joplin and figured we might as well drive to Nashville for the night, because my uncle was expecting us. The HR lady called again, and when I told her I'd spoken to the CEO and EVP and SVP, her demeanor changed, and she assured me she'd take care of the situation with all due speed.
We spent the night in Nashville, and even though my job wasn't secure yet, I started driving to Georgia because, well, what else was I gonna do? On the way, I got a call from the HR lady and the director of the agency in Georgia, and they told me I could be re-hired the next day (Friday) and start on Monday. Not only did I have a job, but also was I going to get to live in a hotel and get a food allowance. Score!
With that settled, we continued our drive to Summerville, Georgia, only to have Jasper (my '02 Intrepid) pick up the nasty habit of smoking. We pulled over in a random parking lot on the side of the highway, opened the hood, and stared with dismay at the smoke pouring out from under the hood.
Fortunately, a couple of houses down, there was a family outside putting up Christmas lights. They just happened to have a card for a mechanic not far down the road. When I called the mechanic, he gave me the number of a tow truck driver who came and picked up Jasper. The mechanic shop was named "Jasper Engines," which I thought was rather serendipitous.
Jasper was diagnosed with a faulty radiator, and the mechanic stayed over an hour past his normal closing time to perform corrective surgery. Fortunately, I'd cancelled my appointment to sign on an apartment, so I had the money to pay for it.
By this time, it was almost 8 p.m., and I still didn't have a place to stay for the night. So we drove to Summerville and checked into the first cheap motel we saw. It's a good thing we didn't pay much, because there were two bulb-less lamps, stained towels, and a bathroom door that didn't open all the way.
The next morning, I went to my new office to fill out the necessary e-forms to be re-hired to Amedisys, only to find out that my profile hadn't been loaded correctly. That took a couple of hours to fix. In the meantime, my mom took my car and headed off to find a place in the town of 4500 people that had free wi-fi so she could do some work online. There was no such place. Neither was there a coffee shop. I began to wonder what I was getting myself into.
A few hours later, I found out the name of the hotel where I'll be living for the next 4-6 weeks, in Rome, Georgia (fortunately, bigger than 4500 people - and they even have a mall). So my mom and I drove out there, only to find that the hotel didn't have the authorization they needed to charge the credit card that was going to pay for the room.
By this time, I was so done with driving around with all (well, most) of my earthly possessions in my car. But there was nothing I could do, so we left the hotel and went to dinner. Somewhere around 5 p.m., I could finally check in. So we packed a cart full of stuff from my trunk and back seat, and unloaded it in my room. But since I'm living in a hotel now, I don't need any of my linens or kitchen appliances or anything, so my truck is still full of stuff.
Around 9:30, right about the time they were "moving that bus" on Extreme Makeover; Home Edition on TV, I got a call from the front desk. They still hadn't had a visit from the lady with the credit card, so they could swipe it. Basically, I was staying in the hotel without having paid. Grrr...but what can I do?
This morning, I'm exhausted. Since Tuesday, I've met and gotten something I wanted from the CEO, driven to a new city without the certainty of a job or living situation, put a few hundred dollars into my car, and been thwarted every. single. step. of the way.
On the plus side, fixing Jasper was less expensive than leasing an apartment, I've marked three more states off my list (KY, TN, and GA) to make it an even 30, arranged to start my new assignment on Monday, and even bought plane tickets to go back to MN for Christmas. I even have a clearer direction of what my career with Amedisys could look like, especially now that the CEO is sold on my idea of being a traveling Business Office Manager.
But I still don't know if my hotel room is paid for.
Fortunately for me, the CEO came to visit our office that day, along with one of the Executive Vice Presidents and one of the Senior Vice Presidents. Also, it just so happened that I was able to ride along with the CEO and the marketing person for my office, on a tour of the Joplin tornado damage. At the end of the ride, I had the assurance of Mr. CEO that my problem (of political crap hindering my employment) would be taken care of immediately; by the end of the night, I had the same assurance from the EVP and SVP.
That night, I finished packing my car and went to bed happy that I wouldn't have anything else to worry about.
The next day, I left the house of the coworker who had put me up for a few nights, and started heading to the Greyhound station to pick up my mom. I got a call from a lady in HR, who was super confused as to why I would be moving to Georgia that day and pretty much told me I was crazy for thinking I had a job to go to.
So I picked up my mom and took her to lunch and toured Joplin and figured we might as well drive to Nashville for the night, because my uncle was expecting us. The HR lady called again, and when I told her I'd spoken to the CEO and EVP and SVP, her demeanor changed, and she assured me she'd take care of the situation with all due speed.
We spent the night in Nashville, and even though my job wasn't secure yet, I started driving to Georgia because, well, what else was I gonna do? On the way, I got a call from the HR lady and the director of the agency in Georgia, and they told me I could be re-hired the next day (Friday) and start on Monday. Not only did I have a job, but also was I going to get to live in a hotel and get a food allowance. Score!
With that settled, we continued our drive to Summerville, Georgia, only to have Jasper (my '02 Intrepid) pick up the nasty habit of smoking. We pulled over in a random parking lot on the side of the highway, opened the hood, and stared with dismay at the smoke pouring out from under the hood.
Fortunately, a couple of houses down, there was a family outside putting up Christmas lights. They just happened to have a card for a mechanic not far down the road. When I called the mechanic, he gave me the number of a tow truck driver who came and picked up Jasper. The mechanic shop was named "Jasper Engines," which I thought was rather serendipitous.
Jasper was diagnosed with a faulty radiator, and the mechanic stayed over an hour past his normal closing time to perform corrective surgery. Fortunately, I'd cancelled my appointment to sign on an apartment, so I had the money to pay for it.
By this time, it was almost 8 p.m., and I still didn't have a place to stay for the night. So we drove to Summerville and checked into the first cheap motel we saw. It's a good thing we didn't pay much, because there were two bulb-less lamps, stained towels, and a bathroom door that didn't open all the way.
The next morning, I went to my new office to fill out the necessary e-forms to be re-hired to Amedisys, only to find out that my profile hadn't been loaded correctly. That took a couple of hours to fix. In the meantime, my mom took my car and headed off to find a place in the town of 4500 people that had free wi-fi so she could do some work online. There was no such place. Neither was there a coffee shop. I began to wonder what I was getting myself into.
A few hours later, I found out the name of the hotel where I'll be living for the next 4-6 weeks, in Rome, Georgia (fortunately, bigger than 4500 people - and they even have a mall). So my mom and I drove out there, only to find that the hotel didn't have the authorization they needed to charge the credit card that was going to pay for the room.
By this time, I was so done with driving around with all (well, most) of my earthly possessions in my car. But there was nothing I could do, so we left the hotel and went to dinner. Somewhere around 5 p.m., I could finally check in. So we packed a cart full of stuff from my trunk and back seat, and unloaded it in my room. But since I'm living in a hotel now, I don't need any of my linens or kitchen appliances or anything, so my truck is still full of stuff.
Around 9:30, right about the time they were "moving that bus" on Extreme Makeover; Home Edition on TV, I got a call from the front desk. They still hadn't had a visit from the lady with the credit card, so they could swipe it. Basically, I was staying in the hotel without having paid. Grrr...but what can I do?
This morning, I'm exhausted. Since Tuesday, I've met and gotten something I wanted from the CEO, driven to a new city without the certainty of a job or living situation, put a few hundred dollars into my car, and been thwarted every. single. step. of the way.
On the plus side, fixing Jasper was less expensive than leasing an apartment, I've marked three more states off my list (KY, TN, and GA) to make it an even 30, arranged to start my new assignment on Monday, and even bought plane tickets to go back to MN for Christmas. I even have a clearer direction of what my career with Amedisys could look like, especially now that the CEO is sold on my idea of being a traveling Business Office Manager.
But I still don't know if my hotel room is paid for.
03 December 2011
November Reads
The Power of Six by Pittacus Lore
The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde
Pinocchio, Vampire Slayer by Dusty Higgins and Van Jenson
"The Power of Six" is the sequel to "I am Number Four," and it is nice, but not spectacular.
"The Picture of Dorian Gray" is just as amazing as I expected it to be. The only novel by playwright Oscar Wilde, it is full of the banter, snide remarks, and fast-moving plot that Wilde is known for. The main character's journey is fascinating, and the ending hits with a bang.
"Pinocchio, Vampire Slayer" is a random graphic novel I picked up at my friend's house over Thanksgiving. The medium of graphic novels is interesting to me, and I love the sheer nerdiness of turning Pinocchio into a vampire slayer (his nose is a stake, get it?). It was a fast read, and made me laugh a lot, despite its dark elements and sometimes confusing animation.
And that's my story! I'm pretty impressed that I managed to read three books in the same month that I put almost 2000 miles on my car, watched three seasons of "Lois & Clark," moved out of my apartment, and spent five days in Texas. Good times.
The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde
Pinocchio, Vampire Slayer by Dusty Higgins and Van Jenson
"The Power of Six" is the sequel to "I am Number Four," and it is nice, but not spectacular.
"The Picture of Dorian Gray" is just as amazing as I expected it to be. The only novel by playwright Oscar Wilde, it is full of the banter, snide remarks, and fast-moving plot that Wilde is known for. The main character's journey is fascinating, and the ending hits with a bang.
"Pinocchio, Vampire Slayer" is a random graphic novel I picked up at my friend's house over Thanksgiving. The medium of graphic novels is interesting to me, and I love the sheer nerdiness of turning Pinocchio into a vampire slayer (his nose is a stake, get it?). It was a fast read, and made me laugh a lot, despite its dark elements and sometimes confusing animation.
And that's my story! I'm pretty impressed that I managed to read three books in the same month that I put almost 2000 miles on my car, watched three seasons of "Lois & Clark," moved out of my apartment, and spent five days in Texas. Good times.
29 October 2011
October Read - final thoughts on the big Mo-D.
What? They all die in the end? Someone should have warned me!
Just kidding.
(The first few paragraphs of chapter 132 are also quite beautiful in their description of the sea and sky, but they were too long to type out here.)
The book has pros and cons, as does any literary classic. And so I present to you...
The Pros and Cons of Herman Melville's "Moby Dick," according to Charity:
Pros:
When you're done, you can say you've read it.
There's like some nice prose and stuff.
Cons:
The beginning (boring)
The middle (boring)
The end (only slightly less boring)
My main beef with the book (other than the boring bits) is the POV. We start out in Ishmael's first-person Point of View, but then we start jumping in and out of Ahab's head, and seeing what Ahab does alone in his cabin. By the end, Ishmael is an omniscient narrator, describing everything as though he was in every place, in everyone's head. YOU CAN'T HAVE AN OMNISCIENT FIRST-PERSON NARRATOR, HERMAN! Maybe he's trying to make some sort of point or something, but I see it as sloppy writing. If I had to rate it on a responsibility scale, it would rank only slightly higher than the narrative threads of Glee.
The book came out in the mid-1800's to mixed reviews. My favorite of the several that are printed in the back of my Barnes & Noble Classics edition is the one from January 1852, printed in the New York United States Magazine and Democratic Review:
Okay, I'm done. This was the only book I finished this month, and I am okay with that. :-)
Just kidding.
Pages 601-655
Look to the horizon – it’s a bird, it’s a ship, it’s…dun, dun DUN…an OMEN. An oooooooommmmmeeeeeeen! There are lots of omens of impending doom, and then finally, on page 625, we finally spot Moby Dick. Thirty pages from the end, people. It took Ishmael over 100 pages just to get on the flipping boat, and we only get thirty pages of the most epic whale-vs-human battle in literary history. Anyway, the whale picks off crew members one by one and then takes the whole ship down. Ishmael survives and is picked up by a passing ship.
Best line: Is it I, God, or who, that lifts this arm? But if the great sun move not of himself; but is an errand-boy in heaven; nor one single star can revolve, but by some invisible power; how then can this one small heart beat; this one small brain think thoughts; unless God does that beating, does that thinking, does that living, and not I. By heaven, man, we are turned round and round in this world, like yonder windlass, and Fate is the handspike. And all the time, lo! that smiling sky, and this unsounded sea! [pg 622]
(The first few paragraphs of chapter 132 are also quite beautiful in their description of the sea and sky, but they were too long to type out here.)
The book has pros and cons, as does any literary classic. And so I present to you...
The Pros and Cons of Herman Melville's "Moby Dick," according to Charity:
Pros:
When you're done, you can say you've read it.
There's like some nice prose and stuff.
Cons:
The beginning (boring)
The middle (boring)
The end (only slightly less boring)
My main beef with the book (other than the boring bits) is the POV. We start out in Ishmael's first-person Point of View, but then we start jumping in and out of Ahab's head, and seeing what Ahab does alone in his cabin. By the end, Ishmael is an omniscient narrator, describing everything as though he was in every place, in everyone's head. YOU CAN'T HAVE AN OMNISCIENT FIRST-PERSON NARRATOR, HERMAN! Maybe he's trying to make some sort of point or something, but I see it as sloppy writing. If I had to rate it on a responsibility scale, it would rank only slightly higher than the narrative threads of Glee.
The book came out in the mid-1800's to mixed reviews. My favorite of the several that are printed in the back of my Barnes & Noble Classics edition is the one from January 1852, printed in the New York United States Magazine and Democratic Review:
Mr. Melville is evidently trying to ascertain how far the public will consent to be imposed upon. He is gauging, at once, our gullibility and our patience. [...] [I]f there are any of our readers who wish to find examples of bad rhetoric, involved syntax, stilted sentiment and incoherent English, we will take the liberty of recommending to them this precious volume of Mr. Melville's.
Since then, there have been many cinematic interpretations of this classic work. Perhaps my favorite can be found in two parts on that great cinematic forum, YouTube:
Okay, I'm done. This was the only book I finished this month, and I am okay with that. :-)
26 October 2011
Thoughts on Twilight Vampires
Okay, so the "Twilight" series has its serious issues, not gonna lie. The plot, the character development, the exploitation of minor boys' abs - the list goes on, and I'm not going to debate all that.
What I don't get is why some Christians shun it on the basis that "vampires are blood-sucking demons," but they're okay with Wolverine, Superman, Spiderman, Mary Poppins, and a host of other supernatural characters. All these other superheros have special powers, weaknesses, and things they'd die or kill for.
I'm not saying everyone should read the "Twilight" series. I'm just saying that if you don't read them because you think that vampires are demons, you shouldn't read/watch any other stories where the main characters have supernatural abilities and odd weaknesses.
I also don't get why people shun it because "Edward and Bella have an unhealthy relationship." Ummm...ever read "Wuthering Heights"? "Romeo and Juliet"? "Jane Eyre"?
If you don't read "Twilight" because you don't want to read about an 18-yr-old falling in love with a brooding older man (or a selfish 17-yr-old), you'd have to rule out about half of the classic novels and plays kids read in school and college these days.
So...yeah. Feel free to commence throwing things.
This post has been brought to you by "Twilight" on cable television.
What I don't get is why some Christians shun it on the basis that "vampires are blood-sucking demons," but they're okay with Wolverine, Superman, Spiderman, Mary Poppins, and a host of other supernatural characters. All these other superheros have special powers, weaknesses, and things they'd die or kill for.
I'm not saying everyone should read the "Twilight" series. I'm just saying that if you don't read them because you think that vampires are demons, you shouldn't read/watch any other stories where the main characters have supernatural abilities and odd weaknesses.
I also don't get why people shun it because "Edward and Bella have an unhealthy relationship." Ummm...ever read "Wuthering Heights"? "Romeo and Juliet"? "Jane Eyre"?
If you don't read "Twilight" because you don't want to read about an 18-yr-old falling in love with a brooding older man (or a selfish 17-yr-old), you'd have to rule out about half of the classic novels and plays kids read in school and college these days.
So...yeah. Feel free to commence throwing things.
This post has been brought to you by "Twilight" on cable television.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)